The Daily WTF/FML Moment: 1

I have been sick

I stayed in bed all day and I have had a fever that has been kicking my ass. I was bundled up in my blanket when I heard my phone buzz on the nightstand next to me. My fat ass turned over and tried to reach for the phone instead of getting up. I had no socks on in a chilly house with hard wooden floors. Hell no.

I reached over and I could not seem to get it and I still refused to get up and I had the bright idea to try to retrieve the phone by throwing a pillow and scooting it over to me. I was flinging the pillow with no such luck. I dropped the phone off the nightstand instead (the phone was on the other side of the nightstand).

That was not going to work.

So I decided to use a blanket to get it, but then I soon realized it was snowing outside and it was cold as hell. No way was I going to unbundle myself.

So my stupid face decides to take off my sweater to retrieve the phone from the floor. I had nothing underneath the sweater, I was completely naked. I thought it was a brilliant idea.

So there I am, naked and all, throwing my sweater back and forth trying to slide the phone over when my dumbass falls onto the floor. It was cold and I banged my head on the nightstand. I stood up rubbing my face and my cold feet hit the floor anyway. The neighbors from the apartment must have seen me because they were laughing at my direction (I had the curtains open to see the snowfall).

I looked down and picked up my phone and walked over to the bed and sat down to find out that it was just a low battery notification.

FML.

My mother’s voice echoed inside me in Spanish “El huevon trabaja doble”

“The lazy person works double” technically meaning that it would have been easier if my lazy ass got up and picked up the phone instead of going through all that mess.

For fuck sake…